Good morning, everyone,
It’s Dave here, with some closing thoughts on 2025.
As we head into the New Year, a lot of people start thinking about New Year’s planning, most often framed as New Year’s resolutions. And usually, resolutions are about goal setting: achievements, personal bests, workout routines, the books you plan to read, career accomplishments, even improving relationships. But most of that is rooted in what I think of as the transactional world, measuring outcomes, checking boxes, and trying to “get it done.”
And while I still have plenty of roles that require me to operate in that transactional world, it’s not where I want to spend most of my time.
I wrote this reflection in New York City before Christmas, where I went to record the audiobook for How to Live a Meaningful Life. That moment is part of why I no longer feel the need to make traditional resolutions. In many ways, the resolutions come and get me.
I have roles in the world that I still enjoy, and the systems around those roles, the teams, institutions, and structures that hold them, reach out when it’s time. All I have to do is commit, participate, and show up. If I’m ready, willing, and able, and I simply step into what I’ve already agreed to, the goals are practically guaranteed.
For example: the book work happens because my marketing team reaches out when it’s time. The work I do with Praxis, the social impact venture group I’ve been involved with for the past 14 years, comes back around on schedule. It’s on the calendar. It’s in motion. I don’t need to “resolve” to do those things. I just need to follow through on my commitments.
And after 50-plus years of working, I’m pretty good at follow-through.
So I’m not worried about the typical resolution list.
What I do want this year is something different. I want to be more in what I’d call the flow world. I want to lean into my becoming. And at this point in my life, at 72, what I’m becoming this year is really two things:
1) Becoming married to Frish Brandt
Frish and I have been together for four years, and we’ve intended to get married for about two. Now we have our wedding rings in hand, and this coming year is the year we’ll take what we are becoming, a married couple, and make it real.
We’ll ritualize it, ordain it, and mark it, through a sacrament called marriage and a celebration called a wedding. And what I want, honestly, is to arrive at that wedding having fully become the partner, the other half of the “us”, that Frish and I are creating.
2) Becoming really good at being an elder
The other thing I want to become is an elder. I want to move from role to soul, while still keeping my roles. I don’t want to discard the roles; I want to use them differently.
I want my roles to create places I can go and show up for people.
And by “showing up,” I mean trying to be as fully alive and present to the people around me as I possibly can. Not to fix everything, not to optimize everything, not to rack up accomplishments, but in being present, to maybe be of service. A salve. A help. A steady hand.
Less “achieve.” More “support.”
For me, that shift comes down to a simple change in mindset, almost a tiny change in language that changes everything. It’s moving from “got to” (where I’m focused on future outcomes and obligations) to “get to” (where I’m focused on participating fully in the present moment).
I think of it as changing my vowel from O to E:
Not got to… but get to.
So that’s the mindset I’m bringing into 2026.
I get to marry Frish. I get to move from role to soul. I get to live into my becoming.
And then, happily, I’ll pay enough attention to let the traditional “resolutions” take care of themselves, by showing up when they call.
Have a great year, folks. We look forward to becoming together in the new year.